We wave goodnight to Dad and sister, and then we walk upstairs to his room.
As I lay him down to change his diaper, he starts to giggle because he knows what’s coming. Fingers dancing over his skin, smiles shared, laughter lingering on our lips.
I pick him up again and he molds his little body close to mine. He loves to place his hand gently on my bare shoulder- skin to skin still so soothing- a memory of our oneness.
I pick up his blanket out of the crib, we look for the tag together as I say, “where’s the tag?” He lays his head on my shoulder and his thumb goes into his mouth. I hear the sweet sucking noises as we stand in silence.
Then I pray- always thanking God for my precious James- a gift-a miracle.
So grateful for one more day spent watching him grow, hearing his musical, little voice attempt to turn noises into words-sharing his smiles at simple pleasures.
Teaching me– he is teaching me.
As the prayer ends, sometimes he joins me in the Amen.
I lean over the side of the crib and slowly, gently lay him down on the mattress. Our eyes are locked. Mother and Son seeing into each other’s souls.
Pure love radiates through me as I brush his bangs tenderly with my fingers and whisper “Goodnight my precious James boy, Mama loves you.”
His eyes stay locked on mine as I turn to walk away.
As I reflect I treasure, I savor- I worship. Oh what joy that God has graciously given me such a treasure- that I have moments like this everyday that are transcendent.
God enters into the every day, into the routine, into the mundane- and fills them (bursting) with love and purpose. Moments to treasure, to clasp to my chest in love and longing.
Someday my boy (God-willing) will be a man. Lord, grant me the grace to make the most of these sweet seconds. Let the routine and habits-through the lens of your grace-become Holy.