I have felt so beaten down lately. A lot of it is lack of social network- support- other Moms to talk to.
Sometimes I feel like a terrible Mom- when I lose my temper, get frustrated, raise my voice, and I have to face the bitter disappointment of another mistake- and feeling like a failure.
The Next Day…
It is amazing the difference a day can make. I didn’t finish writing this post when I started it- and now, after today- I wonder how I can write it.
Today has been wonderful- a day when I have savored time with the kids, played in the dirt, enjoyed time with another Mom- and I feel silly for even writing the above.
But the reality is- I think we all have days when we feel as though we can’t get anything right. There can be a snowballing effect when one thing goes wrong, and each bad decision or reaction seems to build until you feel overwhelmed by the size of it.
One of the ways I am trying to fight the negativity in my head is with the reality of who I am in Christ.
When I feel like a terrible Mom and lose my temper- I need to seek forgiveness but also- accept it.
Forgive myself and remember that I am precious in the sight of God and He loves me- not just when I am performing at top notch standards- but even on those no good very bad days when I want to just run away or bury my head in the sand.
Sometimes I forget how far God’s love extends– because I spend my days dealing with people- and we don’t love each other that way. So it’s easy to start thinking that God’s love is limited to the human standards.
Ephesians 1:3-14 – this is one of my favorite passages about who we are.
3 Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us in the heavenly realms with every spiritual blessing in Christ. 4 For he chose us in him before the creation of the world to be holy and blameless in his sight. In love 5 he predestined us for adoption to sonship through Jesus Christ, in accordance with his pleasure and will— 6 to the praise of his glorious grace, which he has freely given us in the One he loves. 7 In him we have redemption through his blood, the forgiveness of sins, in accordance with the riches of God’s grace 8 that he lavished on us. With all wisdom and understanding, 9 he made known to us the mystery of his will according to his good pleasure, which he purposed in Christ, 10to be put into effect when the times reach their fulfillment—to bring unity to all things in heaven and on earth under Christ.
11 In him we were also chosen, having been predestined according to the plan of him who works out everything in conformity with the purpose of his will, 12 in order that we, who were the first to put our hope in Christ, might be for the praise of his glory. 13 And you also were included in Christ when you heard the message of truth, the gospel of your salvation. When you believed, you were marked in him with a seal, the promised Holy Spirit, 14 who is a deposit guaranteeing our inheritance until the redemption of those who are God’s possession—to the praise of his glory.