What is your worst fear? The thing that keeps you up at night? Maybe that nagging worry that keeps you distracted, unable to fully enter into and enjoy the moments you are living- wondering about what might happen, what could happen?
I will never forget one night, when I was going through a Beth Moore study on Ruth. She talked in one of the DVD sessions about a fear that was taking control of her life- her fear that her husband would cheat on her. She talked about how one night she just talked through with God what she would do if her husband did cheat on her. The anger, the pain, the betrayal, but she came to realize that it would hurt and be hard- but she would be upheld by God, by friends and family- and she would survive- it wouldn’t mean her life was over. She realized that she now had power over that fear- it wasn’t controlling her anymore.
I think of that often when my mind becomes preoccupied with fear- and I talk to God about it. Ok, what if my child died? What if my husband was in an accident and was crippled for life? What if my family died in a car accident and I was driving? All those “what if” scenarios that can diminish the joy of the moment- because we forget who is in control.
I look at all Job lost, even his friends doubted him and thought he had sinned, his wife told him to curse God and die. Honestly, it is hard for me to wrap my mind around that book of the Bible.
Sometimes I would rather just pretend like its not in there- because of the depth of his suffering- when he had done nothing wrong, and then the rebuke from God in the end. I feel sorry for Job- even though I know in the end he gets blessed again. I can’t imagine the pain of so much loss, all his children died- even that I can’t imagine.
I don’t know how I would react to a horribly painful and tragic circumstance in my life. But I have faith in God-and I pray that if that day comes- He will give me the strength to bear the burden- whatever it might be.
But I don’t want to live my life afraid of what might happen. Instead I want to trust in God- in His Love that drives out fear.
1 John 4:16b-19
God is love, and all who live in love live in God, and God lives in them. 17And as we live in God, our love grows more perfect. So we will not be afraid on the day of judgment, but we can face him with confidence because we live like Jesus here in this world.
18 Such love has no fear, because perfect love expels all fear. If we are afraid, it is for fear of punishment, and this shows that we have not fully experienced his perfect love. 19 We love each other because he loved us first.
I pray that I will run to God who is my refuge.
1 God is our refuge and strength,
an ever-present help in trouble.
2 Therefore we will not fear, though the earth give way
and the mountains fall into the heart of the sea,
3 though its waters roar and foam
and the mountains quake with their surging.
And know that His thoughts and ways are many times beyond my understanding.
8 “For my thoughts are not your thoughts,
neither are your ways my ways,”
declares the LORD.
9 “As the heavens are higher than the earth,
so are my ways higher than your ways
and my thoughts than your thoughts.
Throughout Scripture God’s character is revealed. And I believe based on His actions toward all those who have come before me- He is worthy of my faith and trust. So I will endeavor to trust Him with my fears- and to focus on what He has called me to do- today- and strive to faithfully serve Him.