Can I vent a little? I am so FRUSTRATED. I love orchids- they are such beautiful plants- but they are rather expensive. They need special soil, special fertilizer, special humidity, special pot- but I was willing to forgive them all this- to actually take on a high maintenance plant. I bought all the necessary things to keep it alive….and it died.
Now, if that was the end of the story, well, maybe we could go on without a bitter epitaph aimed at the Orchid in question. Extenuating circumstances push me to continue. Yes, I admit it. This year, in fact, only 3 short months ago- I bought a second orchid.
The latest orchid met its official demise today, but truth be told that Orchid was on death’s doorstep for at least a month.
What did I do wrong? I know people who grow orchids by just throwing a few ice cubes in once a week and their plants are fine. Seriously, I think this is personal. These plants have a vendetta against me.
All joking aside, I am genuinely disappointed about this last orchid. I really did try to keep you alive- I even danced around the kitchen singing “Staying Alive” when I first brought you home, hoping to cleanse myself of my previous failure. I am the harbinger of death for orchids.
So, if you have an orchid plant you want dead, just bring it to me.
And if you value your orchid’s life- don’t let me near it.